Rumors of Russian Collusion Rock City Democratic Party

While international news has been filled lately with diplomats being expelled from various countries, a new crisis is emerging locally in Richmond City Democratic Committee.

It’s worth noting that Richmond has already made the news nationally in regard to ‘Russiagate’ with the arrest of Former Trump campaign aide and West End resident Rick Gates.

Late last month, in a surprising move, the committee was temporarily shut down and its current officers removed after an arm of the state Democratic Party nullified the recent election of officers. While exact connections are unclear, suspicions have now emerged surrounding gift-giving and election influence.

No one has called McCabe or Comey yet (ed. note: and I still have not collected on my bet), but now wild tales are circulating about influence peddling involving everything from illegal James River sturgeon caviar to RVA Magazine online ads, from kegs of various area microbrewery beer to Richmond Kickers tickets.

There is even speculation about Councilperson Parker Agelasto’s previous Cossack beard, including whether it will make a return this coming Fall as a sign of his international socialist brotherhood allegiance.

Some residents are wondering about stories about Russian officials’ attendance at last year’s meetings between Agelasto, Libertarian restaurateur Jay Crocker, and Green Party candidate Montigue Magruder, but many people are dismissing those as more dishonest attempts to smear third party leaders. Magruder, hearing about these outrageous claims, dismissed them wholeheartedly, saying that he wished the Kremlin, FBI, CIA, or NSA would just go ahead and pay his mobile phone bill.

Russian rumors swirl around all sorts of local matters, including the successful Put Schools First campaign, the debates around meal and cigarette taxes, Virginia Medicaid plans, the Chesterfield “mega-site”, and Joe Morrissey’s law license. If that was not enough, Democratic activist and former state chair Paul Goldman reportedly offered to negotiate a call between Russian president Vladimir Putin, former Governor Douglas Wilder, and former VCU president emeritus and professor Eugene Trani in order to ‘fact-check’.

С первым Апреля!

Notably, as the media continues to hype this and other controversies, Washington D.C.’s local government just passed a significant Fair Elections Bill. And Trump just declared April National Sexual Assault Awareness Month while both sides of the corporate duopoly largely ignore the allegations against him.

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