Burger’s Bernie Belly Crawl Challenge II: The Sequel

Well, it’s been four long years…and, sadly, here we are again…and again, I insert the disclaimer that I do not portend to represent ALL of Oregon Hill residents’ opinion on anything (unless, perhaps, when I am wearing my crown)…

Many Oregon Hill residents, and citizens in general, are pinning hopes on the Senator from Vermont in his renewed run for President. While I truly like Bernie’s story and many of his stances (but not all of them), the reality is that the Democratic National Committee will never, ever allow him their nomination. They don’t want anyone who will rock their corporate sponsors’ boats, go anti-war, or sincerely promote the idea of single payer health care for the United States. They will dishonesty smear one way or another, cheat (again) one way or another, or worse to prevent him from receiving the nomination.

For his part, Sanders has promised to support whoever does receive the Democratic nomination. Harnessing fear and the noise of the ‘But Trump’-ets’, the Democrats will undoubtedly select someone who is very similar to their last Presidential candidate (note that Clinton has been meeting with Warren already), coming dangerously close to the 2016 strategy (but hopefully not repeating the previous, disgusting mistake of elevating Trump’s racism).

I repeat my friendly wager/challenge- I hereby announce that if Senator Bernie Sanders does become the Democratic Party’s nominee for President, I, Scott Burger, promise to crawl on my belly south from Idlewood Avenue down to the James River. (In the unlikely circumstance that I lose this bet, I will concede my loss on a date of my choosing, and upon losing, and I will fulfill my promise to do this crawl on a time and date of my choosing.)

So, if you want to help Bernie or would enjoy seeing me punished and brought low for my political thoughts, I urge you to vote in the Democratic Primary on March 3rd and see if you can help prove me wrong. Will any ‘Bernie bros’ (or gals) dare to bet against me- pledge to do the belly crawl if I am right and he does not receive the nomination? (By the way, I am certainly not alone in this crude speculation and if you would like to bet real money, there are already websites that will cater to this.)

The sequel to my 2016 challenge with the same thoughts- as with some other bets, I sincerely hope I am wrong. This country needs a big change in direction- it needs the left wing populism represented by Sanders as an antidote to the right wing populism unleashed by the Conman-In-Chief, Donald Trump.

With Virginia’s electoral votes likely going to the blue team again, I am personally planning to continue my Green Party streak. But if I am sadly correct about the situation, the real question is what will Sanders supporters do when he is no longer in the race. With electoral reform still far off, I am not optimistic about the country’s direction, even if Trump is defeated.

17 thoughts on “Burger’s Bernie Belly Crawl Challenge II: The Sequel

  1. I am happy to announce that I do have a challenger! Friend and Cherry Street neighbor Jimmy Blackford has stated that he accepts!

  2. Funny, I don’t feel particularly safe. Sadly, I will not be crawling. I did vote for Sanders in the primary, but to no avail.

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